Repeatedly, the author returns to the idea that the victim of cozy abuse, although in a situation not of his or her own making, incurs a kind of life obligation when coming to terms with sexual abuse to work through the psychological damage that the abuse may have done by acknowledging the abuse on one hand and placing oneself in the position of being nerveless and humble before God on the other, "inviting" God to " constitute about dramatic change" in the way life is lived and in the way an individual relates to others emotionally.
In other words, the abuse victim is meant to acknowledge the fact of abuse and the psychoemotional damage that it has done, and and so open himself or herself to the power of God, not so lots to suppress the memory of the abuse as to heal the defame that the abuse has done. The healing that Allender envisi
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